I had a plan, but nothing went as planned.
On December 1, I was going to help Mark with his letter to Santa—or rather, to a random volunteer from the Canada Post Santa Letter-writing Program—like we did the past three years. Then, I was going to give him the Kinder Advent Calendar—luckily, he hadn’t found it yet searching through my drawers.
Then, throughout the first week of December, I was going to do my Christmas shopping downtown Ottawa, promptly wrap the gifts and store them out of sight until D-Day.
Pretty straightforward, right?
You’d think so. On December 1, Feng and I had a combined fever of 80ºC, and suddenly, writing to Santa was no longer a priority unless I was promised he would personally deliver sweet drugs to make our bodies stop aching.
On December 4, Mark was coughing so much that his first draft letter was all wet.
On December 5, the letter was written but I also knew it was probably too late to mail it and get a reply. The official deadline is December 11, yet I didn’t want to chance it because Canada Post is already swamped at this time of the year and it would be frustrating to receive a reply after Christmas.
“Good job, Mark! Now, listen to me carefully. I want you to… close your eyes… no, wait. I want you to fold your letter, put it in the envelope, then close your eyes and make a wish.”
“Are we going to put the letter in the mailbox?”
“Just… close your eyes and make a wish. And stay in your room!”
I rushed downstairs, stepped outside, rang the doorbell, place the Kinder Calendar on his shoes by the door, then ran back upstairs.
“Who was it?”
“Don’t worry about it,” I whispered to Feng. “I’m just trolling Mark.”
Feng looked at me as if I was part of a weird dream he was having because of the fever. He swallowed a Tylenol Extra Strength and went back to bed.
“Mark… did you hear the doorbell?”
“I made a wish! I wished I loved you so much!”
“That’s nice! Hey, let’s go downstairs. OH MY GOD, WHAT’S THERE ON YOUR SHOES?”
“A CHOCOLATE CALENDAR!”
“I KNOW! Must have been Santa dropping it off, then.”
Ladies and gentlemen, this is how you troll your kid.
Still sick the following day, I totally forgot about the letter, which was still on Mark’s desk.
“Santa didn’t get my letter,” Mark complained.
The thing is, when you start something, you have to finish it.
“Huh. Weird. Well, imagine how busy he must be… give him a day or so.”
And these extra twenty-four hours bought me enough time to write a note signed “Santa” and replace Mark’s letter with my message.
“My letter to Santa is still…”
“Really? ARE YOU SURE?”
Mark opened the envelope.
“That’s NOT my letter!”
“OH MY GOD!”
“’Ah, Ah, Ah’…”
“No, it says ‘HO, HO, HO’”.
“’Hi Mark’…”
“’Thank you for your letter.’”
“‘I will come’…”
“‘on the’….”
“’24.’ And then it says ‘Santa.’”
“There you go!”
Honestly, I didn’t think Mark actually cared much about the Santa Letter—the last couple of years, he failed to see why Santa would write back instead of just bringing gifts—but he has been reading the message over and over again for the past few days.
Note to self—next year, write something more inspirational.
“I mean, it’s pretty fucked up when you think about it,” I said one night, spreading Laughing Cow cheese on a slice of bread. “Half of the world spends time and efforts tricking kids into believing in Santa Claus, just for one day going ’ah ah! We lied to you! He doesn’t exist!’”
“I KNOW!” Feng replied, peeling a mandarin orange.
“Honestly, I don’t think Mark really believes that Santa exists. It’s irrelevant, anyway—he is looking forward to getting gifts, preferably big ones and many of them. He just accepts the story because, hey, why not? After all, we are like that too. I mean, we both claim we don’t believe in god—and we don’t believe in organized religion, for sure—but we’re still superstitious and we believe in karma. That’s the way it is. We all need a bit of magic, some hope and cool stories.”
it’s interesting since you’re atheist (or agnostic?) but still excited about this Santa thing! but yeah, I always hope for Christmas magic anyway every year 🙂
How do you see Christmas as a Muslim? This is interesting to me! Here there are two trends: some Muslims consider it’s just a holiday and they celebrate it for the kids without any religious component and some tie it to Christianity and don’t celebrate.
in some (muslim Indonesian) community, it is forbidden to celebrate X-mas. saying/celebrating Merry Christmas is considered a sin in some extent (and also valentine).
it has been an issue every now and then.
sometimes I wonder, why don’t they relax a little bit…:)) we are enjoying the holiday, anyway!
I-myself – still humming “Gloria In excelcis deo…” everytime I hear the song 😉
I like your attitude! I think nothing should be banned, and it shouldn’t be a sin to enjoy other cultural celebrations. And I do wish more non-Muslims would be curious about Muslims celebrations too, that’s only fair!
Just adorable, all around :). Hope you have a happy holiday!
Thank you! 🙂
What about plan C, then?
Plan B was enough, which is just well cause I didn’t go further in the alphabet.
Cute! I hope you guys are feeling better though? He’s probably at that age when he’s excited to correspond with Santa and get a reply, to get more into it as it were 🙂 It might be a big lie but it’s part of the magic of childhood that you get to believe in miracles like Santa
Sadly when it comes to god some people stay like the little kid that believed in Santa and refuse to have anybody tell them they don’t believe in him or that there might be an alternative 😉
Basically :
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-kyQUG9pJErI/TnBT_NC4BSI/AAAAAAAAD3Y/8MkeEZVLpOs/s1600/santa.jpg
Nope, still sick 😆
You’re right, a bit of Christmas magic is fine I think.
I never understood believers who feel the need to convert non-believers. Like… why?
Because they are RIGHT and you are WRONG.
More seriously, it is an important part in some versions of christianity (mormonism, Jéhovah witnessism, evangelicalism), it is even a duty for them for “witness” to heathens.
I’ve heard of this “duty”. Hell (pun intended), I know about missionaries, etc. Yet I can’t comprehend why it’s so important to convince people you’re right and that your path must be followed. I just… don’t get it. Religion would be better without proselytism.
I like your explanation ! I don’t want to lie, but I like this magic part. A friend of mine doesn’t make her children believe in Santa because she was really upset the day she discovered the truth. But I believe in magic too. And I guess many children don’t believe in Santa so much, especially around 6-7 but they want the possibility to ask for big presents 🙂
I’m going to do the same with the letter, I forgot to send it …
Tell me if you got a cool story with your Santa letter 😉 I think it’s almost more fun to reply to it actually!
I can’t remember believing in Santa so I was never truly disappointed. But I liked the fact my parents played the script and created some magic for us, kids. I think that’s what I’m trying to do with Mark.