“What do they mean by ‘All Thru Traffic’? Like, would people cut through corn fields otherwise?”

“In American horror movies, they always do.”

“Oh, look, we’re entering a ‘Fallen Rock Zone’!”

American traffic signs are different. Even for us, Canadians, they are quite funny. Something different, I suppose. Go ahead, make fun of our polite, bilingual signs anytime. Fair enough.

“Fuck. I should have turned here.”

“Why?”

“There was a sign saying ‘Seek Alternative Route,’ and now it looks jammed…”

“Who speaks like that?! Seek alternative route… can’t they say what’s going on instead? Like, ‘accident, slow traffic, take this road instead.’”

“What did the sign say?”

“Buffalo, 100.”

“That’s not too bad.”

“Miles. Not kilometres.”

Feng sighs. “Right, I forgot. Okay, it’s going to take forever. It’s really jammed.”

“Are we there yet?”

“Nope.”

We left Ottawa at 8:30 a.m., just as planned.

Okay, I think it was actually 9:30 a.m. Still, early enough.

We crossed into New York State at Ogdensburg, an hour later. I have no idea what happened between the border and Syracuse, I was sleeping. Apparently, I didn’t miss much—it was pouring rain.

I woke up before a quick pit stop somewhere on Interstate 90.

It’s been corn fields, quirky signs, big trucks and occasionally funny vanity plates ever since, and it’s now 4 p.m.

“Alabama… Florida… Ohio… Pennsylvania… New York, New York… California… Where are these folks going? Why do Americans always seem to drive across states for no reason?”

“I finished my two books. I have officially nothing to do. We’re close, right?”

“Nope. Sorry, Mark. We still have to go through Buffalo, then cross back into Canada at Niagara Falls. Where is the hotel, already? Oakville? Then hopefully we will make it to downtown Toronto before… ahem, midnight.”

“We have to cross back into Canada?”

“I don’t remember saying we were starting a new life in the US…”

We eventually started moving again. Apparently, a truck had caught on fire a couple of hours earlier, causing a massive traffic jam on the interstate.

Not that I could go online to check what was going on—roaming fees are brutal.

We drove straight through Buffalo. We only stopped in Niagara Falls to buy never-seen-before-in-Canada cookies and crackers and get some gas. Feng did some Chinese math out loud—twenty fractions and percentages later, he confirmed it was cheaper in the US.

Then we finally took the Rainbow Bridge to re-enter Canada, where we waited in line with so many Chevy Silverado pickup trucks, apparently New York State’s favourite ride.

We ended up in Toronto’s Chinatown around 8 p.m. Not too bad, I supposed, considering the traffic in the GTA.

Let’s get this Thanksgiving long weekend started!

U.S. Customs and Border Protection - Ogdensburg Port of Entry
U.S. Customs and Border Protection – Ogdensburg Port of Entry
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Interstate 90, New York State
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Niagara Falls, Niagara County, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
Rainbow Bridge, Niagara Falls, NY, USA
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9 Comments

  1. Martin Penwald October 10, 2023 at 12:32 pm

    Tu sais comment on ramasse la papaye ?
    – avec une foufourche.

    Tu sais comment on transporte la papaye ?
    – avec un thru truck.

    Reply
    1. Zhu October 10, 2023 at 9:08 pm

      J’ai ri.

      Reply
  2. Martin Penwald October 10, 2023 at 12:37 pm

    The I-90 is expensive too, no ?
    What did you do in the US ?

    Reply
    1. Zhu October 10, 2023 at 9:10 pm

      We’re still waiting for the toll to be sent by mail 😆

      It was just an alternative route because 1) kind of sick of the 401 2) we wanted to stop in the US for absolutely no reason other than buying junk food and checking out cities we haven’t been in a while. We rarely go to Niagara Falls NY State so it was an opportunity I guess.

      Reply
      1. Martin Penwald October 10, 2023 at 10:22 pm

        It’s still a huge detour. To change, you could take highway 7 until Petersborough and then highway 115. Or even go through the Algonquin Park by highway 60 maybe.

        Reply
        1. Zhu October 11, 2023 at 2:27 am

          Noted for next time!

          I wasn’t in charge of driving so Feng picked whatever route he wanted. Turned out okay, though. Longer, for sure, but the 401 can be hopeless jammed as well.

          Reply
          1. Martin Penwald October 11, 2023 at 10:00 am

            The 401 is shitty especially around Toronto, let’s say between Milton and Oshawa, and it’s almost unavoidable to make it to Toronto unfortunately.

            However, I note that going through the Algonquin Park is still shorter (more than 100 km less) than going through NY, and it’s pretty easy. 417 NW to Renfrew, 60 W to Huntsville, 11 S and 400 S to Toronto.
            The 230 km on highway 60 are probably not as fast as the rest, especially during a long week-end where there will be probably a lot of trafic, but the rest is all 4-lanes highway, and you avoid the 401 completely. The 400 and 427 on Toronto will still be packed, though, but it’s Toronto.

          2. Zhu October 11, 2023 at 9:59 pm

            I’m actually saving your message for the next time! The road must be nice through Algonquin Park as well.

            The traffic in the GTA is insane. The hotel was in Oakville and going to downtown TO was taking at least an hour, except late at night when it would just be 25 minutes. Crazy. I can’t imagine communiting every day…

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