One Dragon Baby to Rule Them All—A Month Later, in Numbers

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Mark, Day 30

As I am typing this, Mark is exactly four week old—but I can’t really tell which day we are or whether it’s night or day because the past few weeks have been a blur. Last thing I remember, I was taking pictures between two contractions in Room 8, at the Civic Hospital, where Mark was going to make an entrance into the world. And here I am, tonight, wearing milk-stained clothes, sipping a Coke Zero and trying to stay awake—and sane.

We are a family. We have a family. It’s the three of us now, a multicultural household in a multicultural country. Writing this makes me smile: I am now a mother, Feng is a father and we have a child. It still feels unreal but yet strangely natural.

Yet we are such an unlikely family. I am French, Feng is Chinese, we met in Beijing, we both ended up with a Canadian citizenship and living in Ottawa, Mark was “made” in Central America… what were the chances!

So here is our first month as a family… in numbers:

Diapers changed: about a billion (sorry landfill, sorry environment!). Damn you City of Ottawa for switching to bi-weekly garbage pickup just now!

Car trips taken late in the night in a desperate attempt to put Mark to sleep: two. Oh and he did fell asleep in the car seat… but woke up as soon as we stopped in the driveway.

Clothes thrown away: one (cheap) white onesie, following a particularly nasty pooping incident. You don’t want the details, trust me. And question: who decided that baby clothes should be white? Seriously!

Mail Mark received: lot of cute cards (thank you all!), his birth certificate, health card and SIN card. Yep buddy, Big Brother is already watching you!

Pictures taken: about two hundreds, including some silly ones I will definitely post on his Facebook wall when he is a teen. Revenge is a dish best served cold, honey.

Number of nipples sucked on a daily basis by a hungry beast: two. And unfortunately, the “hungry beast” is not Feng, nor this is a metaphor for kinky bedroom time.

Number of times Mark ends up sleeping with either of us: about 70% of the time. He uses us as giant pillows and can wake up the second we attempt to leave the bed.

Number of times Mark slept through my in-laws visits: all of them. Even though everyone was shouting out around him in Mandarin. Go figure.

Number of times I drank my tea cold: 30 times. The last time I drank it hot was at the hospital, shortly after giving birth, when Mark was sleeping… like a baby. Ah ah.

Number of times I say “ah, just let him cry for a minute” and last about thirty second before picking him up: twenty times a day. Do the math.

Number of times I passed out while breastfeeding: at least once. That I rememb—zzzzzzzzzzz…….

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About Author

French woman in English Canada. World citizen, new mom, traveler, translator, writer and photographer. Looking for comrades to start a new revolution.

27 Comments

  1. Awesome post! Sometimes it’s posts like these that make parenting rewarding. You should save this until when he is older and show it to him later, and see how he reacts. 🙂

  2. I would very often fall asleep with the baby (or babies) latched to the breast(s)… and wake up hours later with them still asleep were I left them. Oh the memories…

  3. > includ­ing some silly ones I will def­i­nitely post on his Face­book wall when he is a teen. Revenge is a dish best served cold, honey.

    Haha, I have a ton of pictures and videos of my cousin from around when he was born. It’ll be awesome to post them on his FB wall when he’s a teen.

  4. Hi Zhu,
    You will have a million more of these stories once Mark turns one! It is all hands on experience and you know in the end that it is for the right cause.

    Wait until your family in Nantes will get to meet Mark.
    Priceless moments in family life.
    X

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