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Mark – Code Name: The Destroyer

Gone is the tiny little thing who would spend hours nested against my chest, in the sling. Well, he wouldn’t mind being held and cuddle constantly—although “cuddling” with Mark often means having your hair pulled and your face scratched—but the “little thing” morphed into an overactive baby who just won’t stop moving.

And destroying shit.

Mark learned a bunch of new skills in France (thanks, mom and dad, really, merci!), including standing up and crawling.

And boy, does he crawl. He is fast, faster than I’d be moving on all fours like that. Put him down for a second on the floor, on the grass, on the sand and you will see him quickly analyzing his surroundings, like some kind of Terminator.

Once the “scan” is complete, he usually makes a beeline for what I hope he wouldn’t notice—the wires, the plugs, anything fragile or breakable, anything dangerous.

Nothing can stop him. And if you try, be prepared for the loudest plea you will ever hear, complete with crocodile tears.

I’m sick of hearing myself repeating “Mark, no. NO!” all day long. Usually, when I say “no”, he pauses, looks at me and waits. And as soon as I turn around, he starts whatever he was trying to do again.

In France, he discovered electrical outlets and had a lot of fun unplugging appliances. He also fell in love with an old boombox—he’d bang on it until we would turn the radio on. He loves wires and my laptop. He likes chewing on keys, socks… anything, really (but he doesn’t like to eat veggies, go figure! I mean, between carrots and a sock, I take carrot anytime). He loves tearing paper into little pieces, including receipts, bills, statements… good thing our new twenty dollar bills are made of plastic because he tries to rip one in half the other day. On the bright side, I no longer need to buy a paper shredder.

He broke a salad bowl at my parents’ place, as well as my necklace. And that’s just for the past two weeks.

Oh, just in case you were wondering—we do supervise him. See, whenever I’m not in sight, he screams. But he is faster than us—and apparently less tired too.

Where is the pause button on that kid?

Trouble is Coming
Trouble is Coming
Playing Nicely...
Playing Nicely…
Eyeing Mommy
Eyeing Mommy
And Destroying Shit
And Destroying Shit
Got It!
Got It!
Inspecting
Inspecting
Testing
Testing
Protesting
Protesting
I Ain't Done Nothing!
I Ain’t Done Nothing!

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