The French are weird, and I’m not afraid to say it because I’m French and I occasionally indulge in weird French things, like protesting or eating rotten cheese.

Of course, these weird French things are not weird at all in France—they only become oh-so-French when I share them with Canadians and people from other parts of the world. This is why sharing cultures is both fun and important. It’s the chance to discover that the most mundane aspects of your everyday life are completely normal to you and very strange to outsiders.

This is a case of “this is perfectly normal” until you spot it with foreign eyes, in which case it becomes weird.

Mark provided the foreign perspective on this one.

“Mommy, why is French toilet paper pink?” he asked me last summer. “Look, even French baby books show pink toilet paper!”

I immediately checked my mum’s bathroom—no pink toilet paper, just the boring white version. I should have known, I had just brought it back from Carrefour.

But I’ve seen rolls and rolls, sheets and sheets of pink toilet paper during my 18 years in France. The cheap single-ply toilet paper provided in school bathrooms—most of the time, it wasn’t even a roll but a thick stack of very thin sheets left on the floor, we used to grab a bunch and clog the toilets, much to the janitor’s dismay. I’ve seen thick rolls of pink or occasionally green toilet paper, some of it scented, in various French bathrooms as well, although these days, white toilet paper with a floral pattern seems to be the standard—hey, we’re still recovering from the pandemic toilet paper shortage, merde!

I paused for a second. Have I ever seen scented or pink toilet paper anywhere else in the world?

Nope.

Okay, maybe this is a French thing.

The French are weird with bathrooms. Public bathrooms are often few and far between. Even in places where bathrooms should definitely be available—schools, malls, restaurants, bars, etc.—chances are they will be old, dirty or “temporarily” unavailable.

It’s almost as if the French see peeing and pooping as a sign of weakness.

But when they do, they do it with style, using pink toilet paper.