I started to suspect Vitória wasn’t exactly famous for beaches when I asked the driver if the bus was going to “Praia do Canto.”

“Praia? No, I’m going across the bridge, to Vitória.”

Other passengers chimed in eagerly. “No praia, just Vitória.”

I shrugged and got on the bus anyway—I just needed a ride across the bridge connecting Vila Velha and Vitória, I’d find “Praia do Canto” by myself… or not. Whatever.

Then I proceeded on further embarrassing myself trying to pay cash for my ticket.

“Sorry, only bus cards.”

I gave the cash to another passenger who used her card to pay for my fare.

To top it all, I spent the ten-minute ride with my eyes glued to the window, enjoying the scenic drive across Brazil’s second-tallest bridge, while other passengers were just watching videos on their phone.

Let’s play “spot the foreigner”…

The bus dropped me off in a neighbourhood Google Maps insisted on calling “Praia do Canto.” Granted, not much of a beach by Brazilian standards. It reminded me of Botafogo in Rio—nice scenery, but mostly a marina.

I spotted a pedestrian bridge to Ilha do Frade—hey, why not?

It started to get weird about halfway across the bridge. There was a tiny beach just at the entrance of the island and it was packed with… well, regular people, mostly teens, actually. I mean, it was a sunny day, nothing unusual here. However, the yachts and jet skis just metres away clearly belonged to a different kind of crowd.

The island was open to the public but there were signs I was stepping into an open-air luxury condo—military police at the entrance of the one and only road, mansions, fancy cars, signs warning me CCTV systems were watching me.

The island is small. It’s basically one straight road branching into a series of one-way streets on both sides, and a showcase of luxurious residential architecture everywhere you look. Manicured lawns as well as far as I could see—many mansions were hidden behind tall walls.

There was a small pond in the middle of the island, apparently a top spot for professional photoshoot sessions because there was 1) a family with a baby turning one (and refusing to smile) 2) two very pregnant women 3) three women in bridal gowns 4) two “just engaged” couples, plus roosters and white geese roaming around.

Very strange place.

There wasn’t much to see on the island so I crossed the bridge back to Vitória and explored the neighbourhood—an older and smaller version of Vila Velha, really.

I came back on a cloudy day for another visit. I was hoping it would clear up to enjoy Praia de Camburi, in another neighbourhood of Vitória, across the Rio Santa Maria da Vitória. Praia de Camburi is actually a beach but without the sun it’s not exactly a beach day, even when it’s hot. Never mind, I headed straight to the city’s other “top attraction,” Parque Pedra da Cebola. “Cebola” means “onion” in Portuguese—there’s a famous rock formation that looks like… well, a big onion. Use your imagination. The park was nice and the big surprise for me was the fauna, with peacocks and other large birds roaming around freely.

Honestly, the best part of Vitória is the bus ride from Vila Velha. Nothing wrong with the city but it’s mostly residential and it’s very, very quiet. In a way, it reminds me of Ipanema—fancy shops, no atmosphere.

But hey, rich people, big birds and a weird rock!