French Stuff a French Brings Back from France – 2017 Edition
So, what did I buy in France this year?
Browsing: France
Plane on Time, Bus Delayed and Other Airport Adventures
“If my bag is searched, expect delays. I took the LEGO boat and car and the diabolo.”
Some Thoughts on French People and Food
French may hold a cigarette or an umbrella when strolling the streets but they seat down to eat or drink.
Gross or Practical?
Feng and I were taking a late-night walk and the group of friends in front of us had just noticed something apparently “gross” in the side street they had just passed.
A Splinter Situation
“Oh, Juliette… he got a splinter.”
“No worries, I’m on it. Mark…?”
“NNNNNOOO! NOOOO! DON’T TOUCH IT! DOOOOON’T!”
“Trois Baskets”
“I asked for a… baguette au sésame. But they didn’t understand me at first, because I pronounced it as seSAmee instead of SAYsame.”
A Sleepless Flight Later – Montreal-Nantes with Air Transat
“Is he your son?
‘Depends… what did he do?’
The Final Countdown
“Are we going to the airplane today?”
“Yes.”
“It is five o’clock yet?”
“NO! Mark, just go watch TV!”
Live on CBC as France Breathes a Sigh of Relief
France has a new president, democracy is safe and I was interviewed live on CBC. Enjoy my deer in the headlights look!
“But Nobody Has White Skin!”
I won’t vote in the second round of the 2017 French presidential elections. I refuse to vote for a candidate or a party I don’t believe in.
The Never-Ending 2017 French Election Saga – Voting Day
The plan was to drive to the French Embassy, cast our votes and go home—hopefully the drive there and back plus civic duty would take less than an hour.
The French Bureaucracy Saga: Decision Made
“What are you doing?” she inquired.
“Trying to send a fucking email and get through a fucking server who doesn’t accept fucking attachments!” I replied.
I’m Fighting the French Bureaucracy (And I’m Not Sure Who’s Winning)
We both behaved like proper French and agreed a mistake had been made and it was the government’s fault.
“16 Kilos of What, Exactly?” (What a French Brings Back from France)
The joke is on me now—I have just flown with literally two kilos of salt in my luggage.
Nantes to Ottawa: Thoughts from the Greyhound Bus
If Mark suddenly starts sounding like a Pink Floyd song, don’t look for a hidden meaning or the name of the drug he took. He is just overtired, and so am I.
Ever Wondered What Cat Meat Taste Like?
We are a bunch of atheists, I don’t believe in miracles. The camera wasn’t working.
Maybe They Are Called “French” Fries for a Reason…
When I was a kid, eating French fries—commonly known as the adjective-free noun “frites”—was a special treat.
A Oh-So-French Tale of Passport Application Frustration
This year, I decided to try to renew my passport in France.
Fest Noz at the Castle
Breton culture is taken seriously in Nantes , and so are festoù-noz “(Breton for “night festival”), a fun way to celebrate the regional identity.
Gifts and Smashed Windows
I’m not sure when exactly I started to feel like one of those East India Company trading ships when traveling to France.
The Flight Across the Atlantic
No one witnessed that perfect mother-and-son moment but I don’t care. It’s already stored into my forever-cool-moments-with-Mark database.
Landing in France…
Bienvenue en France. The destination may be considered “glamorous” but my first stop after landing isn’t—I need to go to the restroom.
I Ain’t Scared
It’s almost 1 a.m. in Canada. Seven in the morning in France. It suddenly occurs to me how unsettlingly easy it is to kill people if you want to. Just grab a weapon and shot. That’s it.
Amidst General Indifference
People were walking around him as if he was street furniture. “He can’t stay here!” I sighed to myself.