The Slightly Unusual Things a French Brings Back From France
Since I have room in my bag after gifting what I bring from Canada—typically clothes, sweets, maple syrup and a few North American goodies—I do a bit of shopping in France.
Browsing: France
Are We There Yet?
I feel pleasantly numb and it makes me smile. My evil plan worked—a four-hour night’s sleep to disconnect from reality. Take that, stupid brain!
French Chores
“Mademoiselle? You can sit down. Oh, it’s funny, you have goosebumps… is it too cold in there?”
A Cultural Experience – The Unplanned Visit of the Assalam Mosque
Mosques and other places of worship, even Nantes’ many churches, aren’t usually part of the itinerary. After all, we’re a bunch of atheists.
Good Thing We Have Fountains
Not all fountains are clean and I don’t recommend taking a dip with your swimsuit on, especially if you’re older than ten (you will draw strange looks from locals).
The Migrant Camp Saga Continues
On Monday morning, at 9 a.m., the infamous French CRS (“Compagnies Républicaines de Sécurité”), the French national police force specializing in crowd and riot control, swarmed into square Daviais.
How is France Doing 7 Days After Winning the World Cup?
Last Sunday, just seven days ago, France was winning the 2018 FIFA World Cup after beating Croatia 4-2 in the final.
The Migrants
It didn’t take me long to see one major difference in Nantes compared to last year.
Trudeau International Airport, Montreal, 8:30 p.m.
“Are we in France, already?”
We walk by a couple kissing passionately outside the departure hall, in front of gate 12.
French Stuff a French Brings Back from France – 2017 Edition
So, what did I buy in France this year?
Plane on Time, Bus Delayed and Other Airport Adventures
“If my bag is searched, expect delays. I took the LEGO boat and car and the diabolo.”
Some Thoughts on French People and Food
French may hold a cigarette or an umbrella when strolling the streets but they sit down to eat or drink.
Gross or Practical?
Feng and I were taking a late-night walk and the group of friends in front of us had just noticed something apparently “gross” in the side street they had just passed.
A Splinter Situation
“Oh, Juliette… he got a splinter.”
“No worries, I’m on it. Mark…?”
“NNNNNOOO! NOOOO! DON’T TOUCH IT! DOOOOON’T!”
“Trois Baskets”
“I asked for a… baguette au sésame. But they didn’t understand me at first, because I pronounced it as seSAmee instead of SAYsame.”
A Sleepless Flight Later – Montreal-Nantes with Air Transat
“Is he your son?
‘Depends… what did he do?’
The Final Countdown
“Are we going to the airplane today?”
“Yes.”
“It is five o’clock yet?”
“NO! Mark, just go watch TV!”
Live on CBC as France Breathes a Sigh of Relief
France has a new president, democracy is safe and I was interviewed live on CBC. Enjoy my deer in the headlights look!
“But Nobody Has White Skin!”
I won’t vote in the second round of the 2017 French presidential elections. I refuse to vote for a candidate or a party I don’t believe in.
The Never-Ending 2017 French Election Saga – Voting Day
The plan was to drive to the French Embassy, cast our votes and go home—hopefully the drive there and back plus civic duty would take less than an hour.
The French Bureaucracy Saga: Decision Made
“What are you doing?” she inquired.
“Trying to send a fucking email and get through a fucking server who doesn’t accept fucking attachments!” I replied.
I’m Fighting the French Bureaucracy (And I’m Not Sure Who’s Winning)
We both behaved like proper French and agreed a mistake had been made and it was the government’s fault.
“16 Kilos of What, Exactly?” (What a French Brings Back from France)
The joke is on me now—I have just flown with literally two kilos of salt in my luggage.
Nantes to Ottawa: Thoughts from the Greyhound Bus
If Mark suddenly starts sounding like a Pink Floyd song, don’t look for a hidden meaning or the name of the drug he took. He is just overtired, and so am I.